On the difficulties of distance.

This post is dedicated to someone in particular, and he knows who he is, but I’m writing it to illustrate just how hard it is to be apart from someone you love with all your heart.

I’m engaged to a wonderful, amazing man. I can’t help but smile when I see his cheeky grin, he can make me laugh with the things he says and he’s also the most caring, generous, loving person I’ve ever met. He never puts himself first, no matter how many times I’ve told him to. He’ll always think of others first. I want to spend the rest of my life with this man – I want to marry him and have a family with him, and if I could, I’d spend all my free time with him.

Now we’re going through possibly the biggest challenge we’ve ever faced – I’m now living an hour and a half away from him. “An hour and a half isn’t too far away”, I hear you scoff. Maybe, but petrol is expensive, and so are bus tickets, and even though we make the best of it, we can’t see each other as often as we want to. Next time I see him will be the first weekend of October, and whilst it’s less than two weeks away, it still feels like such a long time. We chat via webcam, and we call each other, and text all the time, but it’s not the same as being able to hug and kiss each other and just be together. I’d give anything right now to be cuddling up next to him, keeping warm in the cold and rain, rather than writing this blog post about how much I miss him.

I’ve taken him for granted in the past – I figured he’d always be right next to me, and I never realized just how much difference the distance between us would make. I knew I’d miss him, but I don’t think I was quite prepared for how much. Still, I know we’ll make it through this, because we’re both working hard to make a good future for us as a couple and eventually a family. It’ll all be worth it in the end, and I hope he knows that I love him so much – whether he’s ten minutes or two hours away, I’m his forever and I’m always there for him.

Forever can never be long enough for me

To feel like I’ve had long enough with you

Forget the world now, we won’t let them see

But there’s one thing left to do

Now that the weight has lifted

Love has surely shifted my way

Marry me…